Me Too

Being posted on social media right now

Me too.
.………
If all the women who have been sexually harassed or assaulted wrote “Me too” as a status, we might give people a sense of the magnitude of the problem.

Copy/paste.

I’ve been uncomfortable since I posted “Me Too” on my Facebook page. Really uncomfortable.

There are many reasons for my discomfort.
– This is something I don’t talk about
– This is not how I want to be identified
– I’m not looking for pity
– I don’t want people wondering ‘who’ did ‘what’
– I don’t want any attention for this

It took several days of seeing the “Me Too” Posts before I chose to respond. Then I nearly took it down.

But this is a big deal. If the fact that I need to face my discomfort for a day or two helps expose how immense this problem is, I can do that. Because right now … right this minute … today … tomorrow … there are too many women whose “Me Too” is spoken silently while they live in abuse and pain. There are also too many others who aren’t able to post for reasons too numerous to list.

Comments I’ve seen on other posts break my heart. “Mine wasn’t that big of a deal, I don’t want to draw attention to something that isn’t as bad as what others have dealt with.” Oh yes it was. If you still remember it, it’s a big deal to you. No one should ever take advantage of you.

There is so much more I could … maybe should … say about harassment and assault, but for now, this is enough.

~~~

Last night Jenny Lawson, aka The Bloggess, posted this and it’s the right thing. (Jenny writes hilariously funny and deeply honest books as well as a hilariously funny and deeply honest blog. She’s got more courage than I can even describe. Follow her Facebook page or her blog site.)

My timeline is full of men and women proclaiming “me too” regarding being the target of sexual harassment and assault.

If you are one of those and are speaking out I am proud of you.

If you are one of those but don’t want to share your story publicly I am proud of you for setting boundaries that are safe for you.

If you are surprised by how widespread it all is and take this opportunity to examine how you can help I am proud of you.

If you are having hard talks with your children about this to ensure they are less likely to become victims or victimizers I am proud of you.

If all of this is too much and you decide to leave social media until it’s a safer place for you I am proud of you for taking care of yourself.

No matter your story, and no matter how or whether you share it, you are far from alone.

~~~

You are not alone. I am not alone. We are all in this together, no matter our stories.

Thank You

TB is posing for me. This picture was taken two years ago – just before the kittens came into our lives. He had no idea what was about to happen to him. (Neither did I.)

This has been a terrific week.

Now, to be honest, most weeks are pretty awesome, but the week after I publish a new book is filled with generous words from you and it fills my heart.

One difficult thing for me, though, is responding in kind to your outpouring of love. ‘Thank you’ never seems to be enough when you tell me how my books have affected you in such personal ways. And yet … those are the times when you bring this mouthy girl to silence. I absorb it all and find that all I have are those two imperfectly perfect words – thank you.

I was very young when my mother spoke with me about this type of experience. As the daughter of a United Methodist minister who also played the piano and sang, I spent a lot of time performing in front of people. My sister and I sang together from an early age. People always stopped us to tell us how wonderful we sounded. As little girls, learning how to take compliments gracefully and gratefully was something that needed to be learned. It wasn’t innate. One Sunday, after I’d evidently not been gracious enough, Mom sat with me and discussed the relationship that was built between a performer and her audience. For those few minutes, that person connected with me. If they wanted to acknowledge how it made them feel, I needed to put myself in their place and ask what my expectation might be. I needed to change my perspective. The performance wasn’t about me – it was about them.

That discussion changed everything for me.

Writing and publishing these books is my job. This life is my passion and I am privileged in ways I can not describe that I can do this. I work hard and live through frustrations, fear, rejection … oh, and fear. LOL. The thing is – the end result isn’t about the published books. It’s about you. For the first time in my life, I’ve been able to be creative and establish relationships that last longer than the creative moment.

The snippets of life you share with me along the way are treasures that I hold close. I will often screw up and forget that you’ve already told me something or that your name is Donna, not Marie, or that you’ve given me your address three times already. Trust me, as soon as it happens, I feel horrible. I’m so danged human – it frustrates me more than you know. A little bit of superhero stuff would be helpful some days. But you mean the world to me.

So as I continue to do my job and you continue to respond, hopefully we will all recognize what an amazing relationship is being built here.

Sometimes all I can say is ‘thank you.’ My heart is so filled with wonder at your generosity it overwhelms my mind and I have no other words.

Thank you.

A Teacher’s Impact

Earl and TB snuggle because Earl wants to. TB only complains when he runs out of room.

For the last two days, you all have been commenting with stories of teachers who made an impact on your lives. (Facebook post on the Bellingwood page found here). What an extraordinary thing it has been to read through those stories. I found myself with tears in my eyes as I read stories of kindness, love, and generosity.

While a few of you were impacted negatively by a teacher, the overwhelming majority of you focused on those teachers who had touched your life in beautiful and wondrous ways. Two things leaped out at me.

The first was that the teachers who impacted you the most were those who made you (me, us) feel special, unique, and loved.

The second was that overwhelmingly, the one thing teachers gave to you that you’ve never forgotten was a love of reading. There were many other things teachers taught to you that you’ve carried throughout your lives, but reading and a love of the written word was predominant.

My sister is a fifth grade teacher, a job that she loves, no matter how difficult it gets. She read through the comments and told me that she came away inspired to do even better with the kids that she has in her classroom.

I was one of those kids who moved several times when I was in school and there was always a teacher there who was ready to lift me out of obscurity and allow me to shine. Mrs. Hill, my elementary music teacher, was the one whose caring still resounds within me. I was bullied by the cool kids because I was new, I was the preacher’s kid (horrors) and I was a nice girl who was fairly intelligent. But Mrs. Hill sat me at the piano when she needed to walk around the classroom and made me feel special when she asked me to play things that she wanted the class to hear. Other teachers allowed me to help slow readers when I finished my work early.

Until I read through your comments yesterday, it had never occurred to me that those teachers probably made the other children feel just as special and important, giving them different tasks suited to their own talents. Of course they did. That’s what made them such great teachers.

Teachers today are required to focus on content standards which takes up a huge amount of class time, leaving very little time to do extra things – like reading to the kids or teaching them how to knit or allowing them to explore their own curiosities. We don’t have a perfect system by any means, but our teachers still care for the children as those who cared for us did. They will go to great lengths to ensure that the kids have what they need to learn, whether it’s a pencil or a hug.

I do the silliest things for Carol’s classroom. On March 14th, they get Whoopie Pies to celebrate Pi Day. On May 4th, they get Star Wars bookmarks to celebrate May the Fourth Be With You. She’s reading “Wrinkle in Time” to them this year. I am going to do my best to find a way to celebrate that and I figure that once the movie comes out, there will be fun and inexpensive things to access. When I read about a fun book that has just come out for kids, I ask Carol if she could use it in her classroom – or even if it is something that would be fun to put in the school library. At the beginning of each year, I sew up little treat bags that she and I fill with pencils, fun erasers, a bit of candy, and other silly things for each kid. You all are creative – you have your own great ideas.

I can’t encourage you enough to care for the teachers who work in the schools around you. Honor the memory of that teacher who gave you so much by paying it forward to these teachers who hold our future in their hands. When they go home exhausted after a day of dealing with kids who face emotional, mental and physical challenges, imagine how different they would feel knowing there are people out there who support them. Adopt a teacher – adopt a classroom. It doesn’t have to be much, sometimes it’s a kind word or a note of encouragement – a reminder that they are doing something amazing and you are grateful. We all know teachers – don’t wait for them to ask for help – don’t ask them what they need – get creative. It doesn’t have to be huge, it just needs to be.

Teachers impacted your lives – you can impact a teacher’s life. Tell them thank you for doing a job that very few of us could handle.

~~~

Book 19 – Boundless Dreams will be here Monday, September 25th! The email newsletter that arrives in your inbox at six o’clock that morning will have the link and as always, another vignette! I can hardly wait!

Bellingwood Vignette, Book 19, #3

Earl’s favorite place in the whole world is snuggled up to someone. Mostly TB, but the rest of us will do. TB is tolerant – generally only for the short term. He doesn’t really want anyone to know how much he likes being loved.

There are only a few more days until Book 19 – Boundless Dreams is released. I’m excited to have this one out and the find my way back to Bellingwood for Book 20.

My publication dates are always the 25th of March, June, September, and December.

To ensure you never miss any exciting news from Bellingwood, be sure you sign up for the monthly newsletter. It comes out on the 25th of every month and includes a vignette and other bits and pieces of information. Sign up here.

Make sure you check out this post on the Facebook Bellingwood page and comment there with a memory about one of the first teachers who impacted your life. I’ll be giving away copies of the Book 19 ebook. The giveaway ends tonight (Thursday) at 8 pm.

This little vignette is a few moments between Marie Sturtz, Noah, and Elijah. They’ve had a busy day and it’s time for bed.

Boys and Their Toys

   “Will you tell us a story?” Elijah asked Marie. He scooted across the bed, coming to rest practically on top of Noah.
  Marie Sturtz sat on the edge of the bed near the headboard, Noah nestled in her arms. She reached out and rubbed Elijah’s shoulder. “What story do you want to hear?”
  “Tell us about the storm again,” Elijah said.
  “You’ve heard that one before. Let’s see.” Marie looked up at the ceiling. “What would be a good story to tell two little boys who should be going to sleep.”
  “A long one,” Noah said, his eyes twinkling.
  “Did you have fun today?” she asked them. The boys were glad to do anything and today they’d helped her can tomatoes, make tomato sauce and put up frozen corn.
  Noah nodded. “I liked the corn the best.”
  “Yes you did,” Marie said with a laugh. He loved eating corn on the cob. Both boys had gotten their fill today and she still managed to put plenty of it in the freezer.
  “I like tomatoes,” Elijah said. He held up his index finger. “That pan was hot, though.”
  “That wasn’t a fun lesson to learn, was it?” she asked.
  Elijah shook his head, looked down and then brightened up. “At least it was only one finger, right? It could have been much worse.”
  Those were the exact words she’d use when he’d burned himself by reaching out to touch a jar after she pulled it out of the boiling water bath. He knew better. She’d told him to be careful, but hadn’t been surprise when he had to try it for himself. Marie nodded and brushed her finger along his cheek.
  He bounced up and away and ran over to the dresser where they’d made room for extra sets of clothes for him and Noah. Polly had dropped fresh clothes off for them earlier this evening with a couple of extra items so they could establish their own territory here.
  Elijah opened the drawer and took out a t-shirt. “Is this a good shirt to wear tomorrow when we go pick raspberries?”
  “It will be fine,” Marie said. “Why don’t you put it on the chair over there so it’s ready for you in the morning.”
  “Should I take out socks, too?”
  “Maybe just the shirt for now,” she said. “Come on back to bed. It’s time for you to wind down so you can sleep. You don’t want to stay awake all night.” As soon as the words were out of her mouth, she knew she’d made a mistake.
  “Yes I do,” Elijah countered. “I could, too. I’ve done it before.”
  Marie patted the pillow. “Come on back up here beside your brother.”
  When Elijah jumped back on the bed, he bounced a couple of times and then climbed across Noah to get close to Marie. Noah, ever-obliging, just moved to make room for his brother.
  Giving him a snuggle and a kiss, Marie pointed to the other side of Noah. “Climb back over to where you belong,” she said.
  Elijah gave her a quick look to see if she was serious, then clambered across his brother and scooted up close to Noah’s back. “Where’s Grandpa?” he asked, looking pointedly toward the bedroom door.
  “Right where we left him,” Marie replied.
  “Watching TV?”
  Marie nodded and grinned. “Yes.”
  “Do you think he misses us? Maybe we should keep him company.”
  She laughed out loud. It had been years since she’d had children this age. Too smart for their own good, yet still so innocent. She had never wanted to pressure Lonnie and Henry to have babies. They had their own lives to live. She wasn’t sure if Lonnie would ever settle down and have a family. If that’s what her daughter wanted, then Marie was thrilled to support her. When Henry met Polly, Marie knew right away that babies were either out of the question or would be a long time coming. Those two were so happy with their lives, how could she even begin to pressure them just because she loved having little ones around. Who would have thought that her life would be filled with children of all ages within just a couple of years of meeting Polly, though. Marie’s life was so full right now, she went to bed exhausted and satisfied every night.
  Bill had found Henry’s old red wagon a couple of weeks ago and this afternoon, when he brought it out for the boys to play with, it was like brand-new. Noah had been over the moon. The boys took turns pulling each other and Bill even pulled the two of them a couple of times around the parking lot in front of the shop.
  Then, Noah discovered that he could be helpful and after securing an old tarp from Bill to keep the wagon bed clean, he’d helped pick up branches and sticks around the yard, then helped Bill transfer some river rock from the back of the shop to spots around the house. Elijah ran alongside, asking a million questions of Bill. The boy never ran out of questions.
  Bill loved spending time with these two little boys. He’d been so busy trying to make a living when Henry and Lonnie were children that he’d missed out on some of these wonderful moments. She couldn’t wait to sit with him tonight and listen as he went on about their day. Every time the boys spent a night with them, Bill turned into a kid himself. He had just started talking about a dream he’d had ever since he was a young man – setting up a model railroad in the basement where they’d once had all of the cars and race tracks. When Henry was young, they couldn’t afford the time or the money to build out a railroad, so he’d done the plastic track and cars, winding racetrack all over the place. Once Henry was out of school, Bill hadn’t wanted to do it alone. Then when he had time and the money to work on it, he figured he was getting too old and no one would be around to enjoy it anyway.
  Now he was dreaming about it again and Marie was thrilled. They’d taken the boys down to the Boone and Scenic Valley Railroad twice this summer. She was sure that if Bill had his way, he’d take them down every weekend. They were the perfect excuse for him to ride that train. Maybe she needed to ask more questions and find out which scale train he would like to start working with. That would make a fun Christmas gift for him.
  She looked at Elijah, who yawned as he leaned on his brother. “You two have had a busy day, haven’t you?”
  “It was a fun day,” Noah said. “I like coming over.”
  “Me too,” Elijah said, yawning again. “I miss Obiwan and Han. You should get a dog.”
  Marie chuckled. Bill had been talking about getting a puppy. She didn’t know if she could handle one more animal in her life, but if she was honest with herself, it sounded like a lot of fun. “Maybe someday,” she said quietly as Elijah’s eyes fluttered.
  He opened them wide and shook his head, refusing to accept that he was falling asleep. “You were going to tell us a story,” he said.
  “I was, wasn’t I?” Marie yawned. “What if I tell you a story tomorrow while we’re making raspberry jam? I’m awfully tired.”
  Elijah nodded in understanding.
  She looked down at Noah, who just watched her with a smile. “What are you thinking about, Noah?” she asked.
  “I love you,” he said so quietly she wasn’t sure she heard him.
  Marie leaned down and kissed his forehead. “I love you, Noah.” She stood up and bent over to kiss Elijah’s forehead. “And I love you, Elijah.”
  He reached up with both arms and wrapped them around her neck, then kissed her cheek. She couldn’t help the tears that sprang to her eyes as she held on to him in a tight hug.
  “Go to sleep, now,” she said, releasing him.
  Elijah dropped back down and scooted away from Noah, snuggling his face in his own pillow.
  Marie walked to the doorway, flipped the overhead light off, and stood watching the boys in the warm glow of the  nightlights on either side of the bed. She was thankful they were comfortable enough here to sleep on their own. Polly and Henry had been worried the first night the boys spent with Marie and Bill since it had taken them so long to feel safe again. Marie had stayed in their room that night until they fell asleep. She hadn’t slept well, waking with every sound, worrying that they would be frightened. The second time had been easier and each time they’d stayed, all of them grew more comfortable.
  A noise on the stairway caught Marie’s attention and she smiled at Bill who came to stand beside her. He put his arm around her waist as she put a finger up to her lip.
  He whispered in her ear. “The house is all closed up. Are you ready to be finished with the day?”
  Nodding, she took his hand and they walked into their bedroom. Once the door was closed, he grinned. “They wore me out today. How about you?”
  “I’m exhausted,” Marie agreed. “This is really early, but I’m ready to lie down and read for a while.”
  “That’s what I figured.”
  She sat down on the edge of the bed and removed her shoes, rubbing her feet as she did. “That feels good.” Smiling at him, she said, “I think you should consider building a model railroad. Those boys would love to do that with you.”
  “Really?” he asked, taken aback.
  “We could clear out the basement again. There’s no reason to keep all of that junk. Lonnie can take her boxes home. She’s never moving back. Henry has a huge house now and he can haul his own boxes around from now on.”
  “You don’t think I’m too old for this?”
  Marie waggled her eyes at him. “I don’t think you’re too old for anything.”
  “Honey, I’m awfully tired.”
  “I was just talking about model railroads,” she protested with a laugh. “But I think this might be the perfect time for you to start building them. I’ll bet you could get quite a bit of help from all your buddies.”
  Bill took a catalog off the bottom of a pile in the nightstand beside the bed. “I’ve been waiting to show this to you.” He opened it to the first page. “Look at everything that is available nowadays. They make it so easy for you to be creative. And I’ve been looking at videos on YouTube. There are guys out there who will teach me how to do it all.”
  “I’m not surprised,” Marie said, laughing out loud. “And if I’m honest, I can’t wait. This sounds like a lot of fun.”
  “You’ll help me?”
  “Absolutely. Which train gauge do you want to work with?”
  He sat beside her and the two lay back on the bed, turning on their sides to look through the catalog together. “I think HO. It’s the most common and I want to be able to easily find the things we need to work with.”
  Bill flipped a couple of pages and Marie stopped him, pointing at a river scene. “I want to build a campground.”
  “Honey, you can build anything you want. I will start clearing out that basement on Monday. Before you know it, we’ll have train track running all throughout the basement.”
  “Henry’s going to laugh at us.”
  “Let him.” Bill leaned over and kissed her. “I feel like a kid.”

Birthdays and Trivia and a Release Date, Oh My!

Here we are … two and a half weeks out from the release of Book 19 – Boundless Dreams. Sometimes It seems like that date is far, far away, and yet, it also feels like time is rushing forward so fast I can hardly catch my breath.

A few things will happen between now and September 25th and I don’t want you to miss out.

1. September 8th (Friday) is my birthday. Whee! Nope … not telling you how old I am. My life is filled with too much fun for me to concentrate on a number. Besides, most of the time, I’d probably be mistaken. I can never remember.

To celebrate my birthday, I think I want to give away a couple of mugs. To enter this giveaway, all you have to do is post a comment on Facebook (under this post) or here on the website as a response to this post. Tell me one place (one place only) on this earth that you dream of visiting. Just one place. Your biggest and wildest dream vacation place.

You have until Sunday evening (September 10) to respond. I’ll choose winners and reply to your comment as well as post names on the Facebook Bellingwood page.

2. September 15th (Friday) is our last Wine & Trivia Night of the year. I won’t host one prior to the December 25th release because the holiday season is so overwhelming. More information will come next week, but join us on the Facebook Bellingwood page between six o’clock and eleven o’clock central time for a lot of fun, trivia questions about Bellingwood and prizes!

3. September 18th – 20th. The Bellingwood Boxed Set: Books 1-3 will be FREE on Amazon. More notification will come regarding that, but if you have friends or family who should be part of this community, let them know!

4. September 20th (Wednesday). Keep an eye out on the Facebook Bellingwood page that day because it is Polly Giller’s birthday! I will post a fun question for you to respond to and then choose winners who will receive an eBook copy of Book 19 – Boundless Dreams.

5. September 25th (Monday) is release day! Make sure you’ve signed up for the email newsletter (you can do so here). At six o’clock in the morning, the newsletter will land in the email boxes of all the good little girls and boys (seriously, Diane – you should have saved that for the Christmas release).

I can hardly wait for you to get to this next chapter in Polly’s life. Things never slow down for that poor girl, but she loves her life and wouldn’t trade it for anything.

Book 20 is already in process, so my next target is December 25th. Hopefully there will be one more surprise between now and then. (The teasing will never end.)

Thank you all for being part of this wonderful community!

Editing, Cats, and Some Eclipse Pics

I’m in the middle of the first week of re-writes, proofreading, editing, etc. This is great fun for me. As much as I love writing, I love going through the book over and over – hashing out problems I created for myself, remembering things I wrote two months ago and being thrilled that I actually maintained continuity for most of them. As odd as it sounds, I do love the editing process. I have learned so much in the last five years and five years from now, I’ll have learned that much more. The English language might feel frustrating at times, but it is absolutely glorious.

This morning (hah – morning for me starts at 12:05 pm) it was time to print out the manuscript. Doing so requires a great deal of preparation. Why? Because … cats.

Every flat surface needs to be clear around the printer because my three cats will come flying in from all over the house. They are also skittish and freaked out. I don’t dare touch them during this process because they jump. TB’s first inclination is to bite me. If I go near him at all (to take papers out of the hopper, anything), I move slowly and talk quietly.

He hates watching the paper go into the printer – or loves it – or something. He will only bat at the paper a couple of times. He’s jammed the thing up with his antics before and I’m not a fan. Earl tries to crawl into the paper feed area – there just has to be something in there he can play with. Grey finally got bored with the whole about halfway through.

The next bit of excitement comes when I pull out the red pen to actually begin editing during this phase. The cats like to play with that thing that skitters across my pages as I work. No matter what pen or pencil, Earl believes its only purpose is for his entertainment and will sit beside me and attempt to chew on the end. It makes writing quite interesting.

But I adore them and will put up with most anything.

~~~

This week I am also focused on the title, cover and a vignette. These and other fun things are coming out in Friday’s newsletter! Make sure you’ve signed up HERE to receive it!

The newsletters arrive in your email inboxes on the 25th of every month. The September newsletter will announce the publication of Book 19! We’re getting close.

~~~

Max was in western Nebraska this weekend in anticipation of the Eclipse. He captured some beautiful photos. I have two to show you right now. He got home late last night and only had time to process these. More will be coming and I’ll let you know that they’re up.

The first is that beautiful diamond ring image. Isn’t it incredible that something like this is predictable? We know what to look for and the sun / moon always come through for us.

The second is just gorgeous! What wild excitement I feel when I see these images!

Lost Kindle Content? Not Really …

A large percentage of you (us … whoever) own Kindles of one sort or another. Over the years, I’ve helped readers with some technical issues as they’ve come up, and it hit me today that you might not be making use of the powerful database that is your personal Kindle library.

Every Kindle book you’ve ever purchased from Amazon is yours forever and resides in the cloud on the Amazon servers. Even if you can’t find the content on the Kindle you hold in your hand, you still have access to it – you just have to find it and download it again.

If you’ve been on the fence about upgrading your device and choose not to because you think you’ll lose everything – have no fear. Amazon has your back.

A couple of months ago, my Kindle was inundated with books that I was no longer interested in reading. Buried deep in the bowels of my Kindle list, behind all of those duds, were books that I had completely forgotten I owned. I wiped my Kindle clean – erased everything from it and started out just like it was a brand-spanking new device. Ahhh … perfection.

How did I get to the books I wanted to read? There are several different ways … read on, MacDuff.

Of course, there is a search function on the Kindle – just be sure you are searching the cloud – not your local device (unless you know for certain the book is already downloaded). Using that, you can download a book / any book you’ve ever purchased. You won’t be charged for it again.

Or … you can do the work from your computer. I grabbed a couple of screenshots along the way.

And no, you can’t go to the book page on Amazon and download from there – silly of them, I know.

1. You must go to your Account page and then find “My Content and Devices.”

Here is where you will find every electronic device attached to your Amazon account.

But more importantly for this situation, you will also find all of the content you’ve purchased (even if it was free).

 

2. Here’s what that page will look like when you arrive (only with your content – not mine):

Do a quick search (over there on the right side of the page) for the book you want to send to your Kindle again. The book will present itself to you (how cool is this?)

Then, click on those three little dots (ellipsis) beside your book.

3. A popup – much like this one will happen, giving you many options.

If you want to deliver it to your Kindle or any of the other devices on your account, you can do it right there.

Et voila – finis!

~~~

A couple of notes about books delivered to your Kindle.

  1. If you delete a book and re-download it, I’m almost positive that if the author has sent up freshly edited content, you will receive the newest edition. I haven’t verified it, but seriously, why would Amazon maintain multiple edited copies of a book?
  2. In the past, many of you have informed me that there is something dreadfully wrong with the book on your Kindle – missing pages, chapters half gone, etc., etc. No, that’s not actually something that I did – the file was corrupted somewhere between your Kindle and Amazon. Simply delete the file from your Kindle and re-download it. All will be well.

~~~

And now … back to Book 19. Many, many words to write before I sleep.

Late Night Crazy Brain

It’s that time again.

I’m two weeks out from the next newsletter. When that hit me today, I’m pretty sure all of the air inside me left in one fell swoop. Whoosh.

Over these next two weeks, I will finish Book 19 and get through the first round of re-writes and edits. I will come up with a cover and a title and write at least one vignette. I will do my best to stay connected online. (There will be much fun in the newsletter, make sure you’ve signed up! Click here to get ‘er done – then come back and finish reading.)

I will also snuggle three cats as much as possible and try to sleep whenever they allow. They’re not terribly agreeable with my morning sleep time. No, it’s not because they want food or water or clean litter. I make sure to have that all in place before I drop into bed at whatever weird hour I finally land there. No … it’s attention they want.

TB is a brat. There are two things that he knows drive me crazy when I’m attempting sleep – scratching on the window beside me and meowing at me. I can’t sleep through those noises and he knows it. The horrible, rotten cat that I adore will sit on the ledge of the cat tree, scratch at the window and meow, then stop and look at me to see if I’m paying attention. If I don’t respond appropriately, he does it again. And then again. And then again. Until I’m about to crawl out of my skin.

You see, I try to avoid responding to it because the last thing I want is for him to believe that his bad behavior will get the response he’s looking for, but good heavens, I can’t help myself. I just want to sleep. He also picks at Earl, knowing that will elicit a reaction.

Then, both Earl and Grey, knowing that I’m fully awake, land on top of me looking for attention and affection.

I know, I know … it’s a terrible life, but guys, I need sleep! Yep … I’m a whiner. My creativity is gone when I’m exhausted. Fortunately, a nap always helps. Even if it’s a twenty minute chair nap with a cat on the desk in front of me and my face buried in their haunches. At least they’re good for that. (I do adore my kitties – don’t believe my sarcastic comments for a minute.)

So what I need from y’all are kitty and puppy pictures, Star Wars memes, funny stories, heartwarming tales and reminders that there is a real world beyond my imagination. I’d ask you to send M&Ms, but I’m afraid you would and I’m just kidding. (No I’m not / yes I am / no I’m not / of course I am). Okay, I have the M&Ms covered. It’s okay. Well, they’re not M&Ms, but close enough. Are you confused yet? Maybe coffee instead (good heavens, will the crazy Diane shut up so we can finish this post? You have plenty of coffee in the house).

There, I dealt with the crazy person who lives up there in my brain. Do you realize that sometimes she talks to me in a weird French accent? It’s like Pepe le Pew has taken over my internal dialogue (not a monologue, there are too many words for that). It’s really kind of strange. And then there are the times when instead, it’s a cowboy drawl. Not just Texas or North Carolina or even Oklahoma. Really bad – movie-bad – cowboy drawl. It’s been known to show up as a Scottish accent, or even Cockney. Which is ridiculous because I can’t mimic an accent out loud to save my life. I’m awful at that.

And … there you have the insanity that happens to me when my really awesome nap ended at 8:45 pm and I’ve written four thousand words and my brain is still wired.

Tomorrow morning is going to be here soon and three cats will vie for my attention. The funny thing is – when I finally crawl out of bed, they’re satisfied and go off to hide for their own naps. It’s just not fair.

Okay, I have to give you a link to a hilarious video on 9 Weird Habits of Writers. I won’t put it on my Facebook page because she’s pretty raucous and there’s some blue language, but this is nearly spot on. I sent it to my sister last week and she laughed and laughed. Just about the time I thought I was unique, this video explains my life exactly (well, except for the taking my laptop with me everywhere – I don’t do that). But be forewarned – if you are offended by this young woman’s language – I warned you. From here on out, it’s your responsibility. (Link HERE – and it’s about an 8 minute video.)

Good night!

A Teacher and Her Kids – Thank Yous from the heart

Seriously – May this card be with you? These kids are awesome!

My sister, Carol, teaches fifth grade. Her kids are never easy – a mix of cultures, education levels, a range of disabilities and behavioral issues, few parents are involved – education these days is a mess. We hear it all the time, but I don’t know that any of us can fully understand what we ask teachers to do if we aren’t in the classroom. And the thing of it is? Few of us have the courage to walk into a classroom and offer to help.

I’m so proud of Carol and the huge amount of herself she pours into those kids. They struggle, she encourages. They fight her off, she keeps loving them. They pout, sulk, scream, rant, rave – she stays steadfast. They steal from her and lie to her and Carol returns every day to remind them that they get to choose between living a life of integrity and one of shame.

The kids know that when she sits them down for another “Ms. Greenwood lecture,” that she is teaching them how to live in the big world out there. They might moan and groan, but even when she isn’t teaching them ‘reading, writing, and ‘rithmatic,’ they’re receiving important lessons from her.

I can’t be in the classroom with her, but I get to be the ‘fun’ part of her kids’ year. I sew up little pouches at the beginning of the year, then Carol and I fill them with pencils and things that the kids can use and have fun with. For Pi Day (March 14), I delivered a case of moon pies to Carol. On Star Wars Day (May 4 – May the 4th be with you), I delivered Star Wars bookmarks. If something special comes to the school that requires funds for the kids to purchase something, Carol and I make those funds available.

This year, we read about a kindness board that used post-it notes. I sent a huge stack of colorful post-its. The kids write kind things on those notes and hang them on the board. They get to see kindness every day.

One thing Carol does on a regular basis is ask her kids to write thank you cards. See … bigger learning than just the basics.

She handed a stack of them to me yesterday. I can tell that she talks about me in the classroom. They know I’m an author. They know I love cats and Star Wars. Those awesome kids integrated what they knew of me and what Carol reminded them I’d given to the classroom over the year into each note.

Yeah. I cried.

Now, while you all are going to try to tell me how great it is that I do this for her classroom, that’s not the point of this story.

You all know teachers. Don’t ask them what they need help with. Nobody ever responds to that.

Offer to do the crazy things – like moon pies and bookmarks, opening day gifts to help the kids get started with a bang. Buy a package of fun-colored paper for the teacher to use. Heck, buy the teacher a gross of pencils and an electric pencil sharpener. Give the teacher an Amazon gift card to buy extra supplies for kids who don’t have everything they need. Sew, knit or crochet gift bags or silly stuffed animals. Buy supplies for a creative bulletin board. There are so many things you can do.

But I promise that though teachers desperately need so much help and so many things, they’ve learned to do a great job with those kids – without those things. You have to find creative ways to offer to help them.

I need to get sewing on this year’s first-day bags. These little thank you notes spur me into wanting to do more and more for Carol’s classroom. As long as she is teaching, I get to be part of these kids’ life and I love it.

Support your teacher friends. If you don’t have a close friend who teaches, make one. Be creative. They need you. Kids need you. We’re all in this together.

Eleven Annoying Lists

Here’s a rant. Just so you know.

I am tired of the number of posts, clickbait links, blog posts, etc., that focus on all the things we are doing wrong. (Caveat: these aren’t real lists, I’m exaggerating.)

– Fifteen things you’re doing wrong in your marriage.
– Five reasons your cat hates you.
– Three things you don’t know about the color pink.
– How you are pooping incorrectly.
– Ten reasons you will never be successful.
– Eight ways you’re hurting your children.
– Thirteen books you haven’t read.
– Nineteen things you’re doing wrong.
– Forty words you’re mis-pronouncing.
– Seven things wrong with NCIS.
– Twenty-two items you’ve been using wrong.

Three cats who don’t fit in the space they’re inhabiting.

We had parents who spent our childhood correcting us. Our teachers corrected us. Even our spouses and children correct us still. We are absolutely wired to pay attention when we are told that we are wrong.

The problem is – in many cases, our response should be ‘so what? I’m doing it my way.’

But we’re terribly afraid that we won’t be like everyone else, so we’d better get on the ball and discover what we don’t know.

These stupid lists make us feel inadequate.

Which, by the way, is the reason that most advertising succeeds in this day and age. Advertising reaches to the very basest of our fears – that we are missing something extraordinary if we don’t purchase the perfect floatie for our pool or the newest fad hair color or fill our homes with junk … on and on.

I’m the worst when it comes to being susceptible to good advertising. I don’t even like Coca-Cola (I know, shame on me), but if I see an ad showing a coke being poured over ice, I salivate. Every single time. Billboards with that image just about do me in.

Anyway … back to those lists of things we’re doing wrong. I get all ragey-furious when I see those in my Facebook feed. I’m so tired of people thinking that the only way to get my attention is to tell me I don’t know what I’m doing.

Now here’s the deal. As long as we continue to click on those links, those lists will continue to be made and propagated in your feeds.

There is so much negative information that comes at us every day. We’ve become inured to it and have learned to live with it, but in truth, we don’t have to live with it. We can choose to set it aside. Hide those lists when they show up. Push the negative away.

I discovered a couple of months ago, as I hid so much garbage from my Facebook feed, that it soon began filling up with things I loved. Pictures of kittens and dogs, stories of kindness and goodness, encouraging words and funny jokes. The other creeps in, but I no longer find myself growling at the screen.

We get to make the choice – either be concerned every day about what we’re doing wrong – or find joy in the life we’re living right now.

I choose joy.

Which makes the title of this blog post ridiculous, but it got your attention. I should be ashamed. LOL.

~~~

Thank you to those of you who have written reviews for Book 18 – Just Around the Bend and the Prequel – Finding the Road Home.

If you haven’t had an opportunity to do so, I can’t tell you how much it means to me that you share your thoughts on Bellingwood with the world. It’s hard for me to ask, but then … look … here I am asking. These are so important to have as I move forward to let others know about Bellingwood.

Right now, I’m most interested in building the reviews up for the Prequel. If you’ve read it and would tell others how much you enjoy reading the Bellingwood series, I would be grateful. Click on the book titles to get to the Amazon page for the books. Thank you!